Words Not Spoken, Phrases Not Said

I hide my feelings to keep you from feeling, sad, upset, depressed, and melancholy.

You say keep it real, but to keep it real, I would crush you, and break your spirit.

You say you want to feel me, but is it what you want, you can’t, maybe don’t want to make me feel you. Loving you for me is like breathing, but you make excuses, when it comes to you loving me.

I am the same woman, that gave you a pass, but that did not mean I did not want to feel the ground shake beneath my body or time pass through my mind. I wanted to give you time to recover from your pleasure, but usually I would let you sleep and enjoy your peace. You unfortunately took this to mean that I did not want to be pleasured and even when I asked you to make love to me; you did not take me seriously. Then, you even blamed me, I am too hard to satisfy, to complex to figure out, but I think it is that you don’t even want to try to touch me that deeply or to spend time figuring out how to make me scream.

Now, we are at odds, because I don’t make love to you unless, you make love to me first, your rule, which I knew would mean that we would not make love unless, I just made love to you and let you not frustrate me, I mean attempt to make love to me. I can’t forget the times I made love to you and you said, are you going to use the wand, or the famous, What can I do for you? I can not tell you all the time I made myself go to sleep, because of my frustrations. So, if you were wondering what is wrong, here it is; Words Not Spoken, Phrases Not Said, because I love you and I don’t want to Hurt you but, I Hurt, my body aches and I consistently put your needs before my own.

Now though, you don’t want me to complain. I should just be so sickeningly sweet, that you have all the delight and feel none of the pain. Because, you are going through, well I am going through with you. You want me to play the villain with all the people you don’t want to deal with and then you tell me I am being mean. You really cannot have it both ways, if you create a monster; you have to deal with the monster. Don’t expect someone to make love with you if you are not willing to take the time to give back what you receive. Yes, I get angry when I have to please myself and then you attempt to make me feel like I am mistreating you. Because I am not making love to you. It is my stand, to hopefully make you look at yourself and wonder if I can make you want to dig deep inside and find out what it would take for you to really make love to me, instead of excuses.

Words Not Spoken, Phrases Not Said.